Is It True That Every Child Can Be Successful?

Is it true that every child can be successful?

For our purposes, ‘success’ means being able to lead a peaceful, happy and contented life. It would also been financial security and being able to contribute to society in a meaningful way.

So, can any child grow up to be successful in this manner no matter who the parents are, no matter where the child is born, no matter the socio-economic status of the community he/she is born into?

The answer is yes.

So, are there factors that can make a child successful no matter what genes he/she is born into and what circumstances he/she has as a child?

The answer is again, yes. Let us look at those factors.

1. Assurance of safety and security

Children should feel that they are protected and are safe. They should grow up in a structured environment where they know what is going to happen next. Setting mealtimes and bedtimes as well as keeping rules and limits are important. Another way to make kids feel safe is to minimize their access to media violence. Also, empower kids to take care of themselves in an age-appropriate way.

2. Physical contact

Skin-to-skin contact, eye contact, cuddling, hugging and kissing when kids are young really set them up for a happier, less anxious life later on. Such children are more adjusted to the world in adolescence and as adults. Study after study have proven this. Researchers believe that this phenomenon could be because of the release of oxytocin – the happiness hormone released when we hug other people.

3. Read to your kids

Parents should read to their kids when they are very young, even as infants. They may not understand the words in the early stages, but your loving voice will create a bond. As they grow older, reading to them will give them a love of reading as well as knowledge in general. They will also be better ready for school.

4. Spend quality time with your kids

Not watching movies together. Not travelling together in a car. The quality time should be spent in either doing things together such as baking a cake, or doing a school project, or in face-to-face conversation. It could also be simple gestures such as leaving a note in your child’s lunch bag. Try to make and eat meals with your child as far as possible. When you have an opportunity to connect, stop everything else and do so.

5. Give them chores to do

What are chores? Oh! Those routine tasks, right? Children benefit from doing chores right from the tender age of 3. Children who do chores learn time management and organizational skills.  If you think 2 to 3-year-olds are too young for chores, think again. They can put toys and groceries away and dress themselves if given minimal help. 4 to 5-year-olds can help to feed pets and make their beds. 6 to 7-year-olds can wipe tables and counters and put laundry away. 7 to 9-year-olds can help with the dishwasher, and help with meal preparation. 10 to 11-year-olds can change their sheets, clean the kitchen and do yard work. Those 12 and above can help with grocery shopping and running errands.

6. Be a happy parent

Are you a happy parent? If not, perhaps your marriage needs some work. Unhappy parents are unlikely to raise happy kids. If there are disagreements, keep them within the confines of the bedroom. It would be wise not to fight at all. But if there is a reason to fight, it should not be in the kids’ presence. Parents are like a vessel which carries their children. The slightest crack in the vessel will send the message to the children that their life is threatened. That becomes the reason for their stress and anxiety.

7. Pay attention, do not neglect.

This may sound like a no-brainer. But this is often the most overlooked suggestion. Often parents think that small things like checking whether a child has done homework for the day, or have eaten their lunch do not matter. But they do. They could be a signal of greater problems. Attend all parent-teacher meetings, and ask teachers how your child is performing in school. Learn who his/her friends are.

And that is how you prepare them for future success!